I did it. I threw most of the cereal up. I hate that. I hate when I do that. Bulimia is disgusting. I hate it I hate it I hate it. And do you want to know what's worse? I hate it because I think that bulimics are girls that have eating disorders that aren't strong enough to be anorexics. Isn't that so sick? I should think its disgusting because its so terrible for you. What the hell is wrong with me? And I'm sitting here wishing no one was in the bathroom so I could go throw up some more. I am so disgusting to myself right now. I really just want to loose weight. I hate this I hate this I hate this. I really really really want to do it the right way too so I can't have this binging and purging business.

Thursday January 12, 2012

All Bran Cereal with Skim Milk
Worked my ass off at ballet
Glass of chocolate milk
Diet Ginger Ale
Salad (Lettuce, three slices of Cucumber, some green peppers, Edemame Beans, Tofu Cubes with Greek vinaigrette)
Gym: 22 min alternating jog/sprint on treadmill, LOTS of abs
Fiber One Bar

Friday January 13, 2012
All Bran Cereal with Skim Milk
Coffee (one squirt of Pumpkin Pie flavor, one sugar, and one half and half)
Diet Ginger Ale
Salad (Lettuce, slices of Cucumber, some green peppers, red peppers, Peas, Tofu Cubes with Greek vinaigrette)
BAD:
White hoagie bun with grilled veggies
10 tortilla chips from Taqueria

Saturday January 14, 2012
BAD:
Large bowl of cheerios w/ 3/4 sliced banana
Emily's bowl of Life cereal
ANOTHER bowl of Life cereal

I was really hung over and I couldn't help it, I really wanted to soak up the alcohol but I regret it now. I don't think I'm gonna eat again today except maybe a granola bar for dinner.

Summation

Monday January 9, 2012.
All Bran Cereal with Skim Milk
Coffee (one squirt of Pumpkin Pie flavor, one sugar, and one half and half)
Four pieces of Vegetable Sushi (Rice, Carrot, Avocado, Seaweed) and Ginger
BAD:
Tofu taco on soft shell w/ lettuce salsa, cheese, and sour cream.
LOTS of Corn Chips
Hannah's scraps from her taco.

Tuesday January 10, 2012
Half Banana
Ballet class for and hour and 40 minutes (ASS KICKING)
A few combinations in pointe
All Bran Cereal with Skim Milk
Glass of Chocolate Milk
Salad (Lettuce, three slices of Cucumber, some green peppers, Edemame Beans, Tofu Cubes with Balsamic vinaigrette)
Four pieces of Vegetable Sushi (Rice, Carrot, Avocado, Seaweed) and Ginger
Dr. Pepper
Sweet Almond Granola Bar
Stretching, One mile around a track,Weight lifting (not long), Attempted Burkies, Treadmill for ten minutes (alternating sprints and jogs), and Abs.

Wednesday January 11, 2012.
All Bran Cereal with Skim Milk
Coffee (one squirt of Pumpkin Pie flavor, one sugar, and one half and half)
Banana
Diet Coke
Salad (Lettuce, three slices of Cucumber, some green peppers, Edemame Beans, Tofu Cubes with Greek vinaigrette)
Fiber One Bar
Diet Ginger Ale
BAD:
Block dry Ramen Noodles
Ran 1.5-2 miles around campus
Some abs.

So things have been going pretty well I guess. After breakfast monday I went back to the dining hall and had four pieces of vegetable sushi, which was fine. Then that night for dinner we went to Barberito's for Jordan's birthday and I ate a lot. Not like a lot, a lot but I had a tofu taco, ate ALL my chips, and had the rest of Hannah's taco... Yeah rough. Well lets see the next day I woke up and ate half of a banana before I worked my ASS off at ballet. After I had a glass of chocolate milk and a bowl of All Bran cereal with skim milk. Later, for dinner, I had a salad composed of: Lettuce, three slices of Cucumber, some green peppers, Edemame Beans, and Tofu Cubes with Balsamic vinaigrette. Later on I had a Sweet Almond granola bar to get me ready for the gym. Here I stretched, ran a mile around a track, lifted weights for a while (not long), attempted Burkies, Ran on the treadmill for ten minutes (alternating sprints and jogs), and finished up with abs. That was a highly successful day. (I forgot to mention I had a can of Dr. Pepper somewhere in there).

Today was not as good. I started my day with the usual All Bran cereal and skim milk with the same cup of coffee as Monday. For lunch I had a banana with my usual salad. Later I decided to eat a Fiber One bar that Emily had with a Diet Ginger Ale. While I was doing my homework though I got really hungry and ate a whole block of dry Ramen. I felt really guilty so I ended up running about 1.5-2 miles around the campus and a bit of ab work. I suppose this is all good. I think I'm just getting a little depressed thinking about all the months I spent letting myself gain so much weigh and get so out of shape.

Anyways as far as my other resolutions go I woke up at 9:30 Tuesday and 10:00 today which is way better than my laziness over the break. I also remembered my vitamins so that's also a plus. My only wish is that I don't end up caving like I so often do. Cross your fingers.

Day One Morning Check in

Today is the first day of my second semester resolutions. So far things have been very successful. Jordan helped me wake up at 9:00 am and it only took ten minutes to actually get our of bed! I showered, did my makeup, and even put time into my outfit. For breakfast I had a bowl of All Bran cereal with skim milk and a coffee (one squirt of Pumpkin Pie flavor, one sugar, and one half and half). When I got back to the dorm I took my vitamins and figured out my class schedule. I don't expect to be able to exercise today considering its Jordan's birthday but overall I'm very pleased. Lets make sure to keep it up!